You Create Your Own Life

Of all the truths on the spiritual path, perhaps the one that is the hardest to accept is the idea that each of us creates our own life situations. Whether it be a job or relationship, the situations we find ourselves in our 100% created by ourselves. In other words, if we are unhappy with our current lives, we have nobody to blame but ourselves.

There are two issues with this idea:

  1. Why would you create a life that you hate? First of all, your life is not created by specific thoughts. It is created by the sum total of ALL your thoughts. This includes not just your conscious thoughts, but your unconscious thoughts as well. So while you you consciously wish things to be different, your unconscious thoughts are blocking you from obtaining your desires.
  2. What about victims of violence and other crimes? Does this mean, for example, that a victim of rape is reponsible for the act? In general, it would be disturbing to even suggest that this might be the case. And there is a reason: even though truths are very powerful if understood correctly, they can be very damaging if misinterpreted. It’s therefore important to emphasize that this truth is talking about one’s life situation, and not necessarily the specific events that happen in one’s life.

Where did it all go wrong?

Many people today are aware of the idea of manifestation and the laws of attraction. What people don’t realize, however, is that one’s life situation is the sum total of all conscious and unconscious thoughts. Therefore, if your unconscious thoughts are not in alignment with your conscious thoughts, you will not get what you consciously want.

How do you know if you thoughts are out of alignment? An easy way is to say aloud what you consciously want. How did it make you feel? Were you excited? Nervous? Did you perhaps feel undeserving? If you had any doubts as to whether you could or should have what you want, then this is a sign that you are blocking yourself unconsciously.

Another sure way to realize you are blocking yourself is because you don’t already have what you desire. If you do want something, but don’t have it, this means you have blocked yourself from it. Not your wife. Not your boss. But you. And only you.

If it Was Easy

Many people take offense to the idea that they are in complete control of their lives. The idea that one’s thoughts can change ones life seems too good to be true. “Well, if it was that easy, everyone would do it!” But that’s the thing: it’s not easy. Yes, it’s simple. But it’s not easy.

For example, it’s easy to say that you want to win the lottery. Or want a nice house. Most people have a list of things that they would like to change about their lives. Making a list is easy.

What’s not so easy is to realize that there is a part of themselves that does not want to obtain these things. At first, it might not even make sense. Why wouldn’t I want money? Or a loving partner?

The answer is that we have beliefs about ourselves that block us from our wants. We are good enough. We aren’t deserving enough. We aren’t worthy enough.

One paradox of the human condition is that although we understand that “nobody is perfect”, we also believe that we are not worthy of happiness unless we are perfect. Therefore, we often find ourselves acting in ways that prove to others that we are perfect, while deep down feeling ashamed that we are not.

And while the struggle for perfection is perhaps a noble cause, the actual solution in this scenario is to remove what is blocking our conscious thoughts. In this case, we are blocked by our own beliefs. And while removing our negative belief systems is far from easy, we will never be able to live the lives we truly desire until we have effectively dealt with our negative beliefs.


That being said, it is possible to temporarily acquire some of the things we desire via brute force of will. I.e, we can work extremely hard at work in order to be successful financially successful. We can put in a lot of time and emotional effort into building a relationship with a wonderful partner or spouse. But as long as our negative belief systems remain in place, our successes can only be temporary.

As long as we don’t recognize this fact, we run the risk of repeating the same patterns over and over. One failed relationship turns into three failed relationships. Our successes in our career might mimic a roller coaster ride. As long as we focus externally on the result, we will be blind to the internal factors that are producing the counter-productive and unsatisfying results in our lives.

Removing Negative Beliefs

Luckily, it is possible to identify and remove one’s negative beliefs. However, it will take a good deal of self-motivation, patience, and commitment. For those who are unsure how to get started, I would recommend searching for a professional therapist would be able to coach you through this process.