Inside Out: How to Make Lasting Life Changes

The Struggle of Life

Most people find that life in general is a constant struggle. Some people never seem to be able to get what they want. For others, life might be going well, but there is a constant fear that they might lose what they do have. Additionally, there is almost always a continuous desire for life to be different than what it is now.

Many people may feel that it is simply impossible to accomplish one’s dreams, especially later in life. Others may find the effort simply too much, and give up after years of struggle. But the lack of success in fulfilling one’s dreams is not due to a lack of effort. Rather, it is the lack of understanding of a basic fundamental of reality: our physical world is nothing more than a reflection of our internal world.

As Within, So Without

Everything that we experience externally is simply a reflection of what is happening to us internally. To illustrate this point, life is often compared to watching a movie. Let’s say that a person is sitting in a theater and watching a movie, but doesn’t like what is happening on the screen. Instead of changing the movie, the person goes up to screen and starts painting on it what he wishes he saw.

This would seem a little silly, but it is in fact what most people try to do. I.e., instead of changing one’s internal world (the movie), people try to change the projection (i.e. the screen). Note that although this might cover up the problem, it would be a bit messy, and eventually the paint is (sooner or later) bound to peel off. In a similar fashion, any change that is created externally will only cover up the real problem, and will not bring about a permanent change.

A good real life example of this concept is clutter. Let’s say there is a man who is unorganized and has a messy office. This would indicate that the man has some sort of internal clutter at one level or another. The man may not even recognize or be bothered by the clutter, though it is usually noticeable by others. And if this man were told to clean up his office, the change will only be temporarily (if it occurs at all).

On the other hand, let’s say there is a woman who keeps her house extremely clean and organized. This could indicate a lack of “internal clutter”, but this is not necessarily the case. If the lady struggles to keep her house spotless, it is a sign that she is outwardly compensating for her internal mess. And since the actual problem is the internal clutter, the result is wasted effort and frustration. The same is true whether we are talking about a clean house, financial security, or a happy relationship. In contrast, when change is implemented at the internal level, it will be effortlessly reflected at the external level.

Life Symbology

I once met a lady who explained that she drives a large car because she had once been in a bad car accident. As a result, driving a large vehicle was her way of protecting herself. It may not have been her only defense, however: I also notice that the lady was visibly overweight.

Everything in our physical reality symbolizes (in one way or another) our internal reality. A common example is excess body weight, which symbolizes defending or protecting oneself from something.

What a person is protecting themselves against can vary drastically from person to person. The lady mentioned above might have been protecting her body against physical trauma from a future accident. Another person might be protecting himself from an abusive spouse (physical or verbal abuse). And still another might be protecting herself from experiencing another broken heart. (By gaining weight, the lady is repelling potential partners who might otherwise be physically attracted to her).

It is worth noting that a person who is not overweight is not necessarily an indication of internal health. For example, a skinny person can indicate someone who is literally scared of life (or scared of the future). And a person who has a healthy figure could be compensating for a lack of internal self-worth. Therefore, it is never wise to judge other people simply based on appearances.

Are You Ready For Change?

The next time you feel frustration about a situation in your life, stop for a moment to experience this feeling. Note how the current situation is making you feel.

Next, imagine how you would like the situation to be different. For example, maybe you want a higher salary, a larger home, or a vacation. When you imagine yourself having what it is you want, check to see how you feel. It is very important to make an honest assessment.

For example, you may feel excitement, relief, and joy. And this is to be expected. But are these the feelings that actually come up? Let’s say, for example, that you are imagine that you have found the man of your dreams. Do you feel excitement? Or do you feel that this is something that could never happen to you. Maybe you feel bitter. Perhaps you are scared that this person will eventually leave you.

Simply notice what emotions come up. If the emotions are only positive, then simply repeat this process every time you encounter such frustration. Eventually, the positive emotions will help attract into your life what you are seeking.

But if the emotions are not all positive, then this is also important to recognize. Often, there will be split emotions: positive and negative. But it’s crucial to note that those negative emotions are what are currently blocking you from getting what you desire. I.e., the negative emotions are actually attracting into your life the opposite of what you want.

If you find that this is the case for you (i.e., you are blocking yourself via negative emotions), don’t be alarmed. Most people habitually block themselves, and part of life is learning how to stop doing this. But before you can move forward with life in a positive direction, you will first need to understand the reasons for your negative emotions. For such a task, I would recommend working with a therapist or counselor who can help you release the source of such emotions. Once this occurs, creating the life you desire will become a whole lot easier.